Decisions of a Husband &Wife
1. We decide to LOVE each other.
We shall not allow anything or anyone to quench our love. We will revive the love when seemingly quenched. We decide to call each other by an endearing name and start it boldly without feeling shy. Every day we will do something to express our love by our words and actions. We will remember each other’s Birthdays and our Wedding Anniversary and celebrate them. We will smile a lot at each other (Rom 13:8-10; 1 Thess 3:12; 4:9; 1 Pet 1:22).
2. We decide to APPRECIATE each other.
We shall not focus on the negative but rather appreciate the positive aspects of the mate. We will not for ego sake hold in a word of congratulation. We will cooperate in developing a gift or talent manifested by the other, though seemingly insignificant. We will not be jealous when one is praised by others, rather rejoice (Gal 5:26; Phil 2:3,4).
3. We decide to FORGIVE each other.
We shall bury the past. We will not make reference to past sins, mistakes or humiliating incidents, no not even a hint. We will not allow the devil to fill us with an inferiority complex because of the past but help one another to come out of it. Everyday before bedtime we will settle any misunderstandings and then pray together (Eph 4:2,32; Col 3:13; Js 5:16).
4. We decide to RESPECT each other.
We shall not snub one another or joke at the cost of the other. We will not throw off the other’s suggestions without pondering over it. We will not make rude comments and criticisms on the other’s figure, dress, manners, habits, family, etc. But any correction will be made gently with love in private. We will not beat, raise our hands or voice, or throw things during arguments. We will discuss, not fight over disputes. We will not talk ill of the other to the children (Eph 5:33; 1 Pet 3:7,8; Rom 12:10).
5. We decide to SATISFY each other.
We shall keep the other as the centre of our attention. “I” will not be the focus. In matters pertaining to food, outing, clothes, friends, children, hobby, sex, etc., we will see that the other is satisfied. We will often ask, “What do you want?” or “What do you like?” or “Which one do you prefer?” or “What is your opinion?” before taking decisions. We decide not to cross the Scriptural boundary in satisfying the other. We will not drive the other crazy by over-expectation for satisfaction (1 Cor 10:24; 1 Cor 7:3- 5,33,34b).
6. We decide to UNDERSTAND each other.
We shall try our best to know and understand each other’s longings, feelings, hurts, dreams, sorrows and joys. We will try to understand each other’s physical, social, spiritual and emotional needs. We will not pry into the other’s thought life, nor blame one’s thoughts, knowing we are not mind-readers. We will not swallow our hurts, making it difficult for the other to understand us but learn to express it without anger (1 Sam 1:8; Rom 14:2,3; Gal 6:2; 1 Thess 4:18).
7. We decide to TOUCH each other.
We shall not be embarassed to touch one another. We shall put out the idea that to touch is only for sex. We will touch while talking, laughing and enjoying some fun together. We will be together in social functions. We will hold hands and pray before retiring to bed. We will hold hands before we fall asleep. We will not sleep separately (SS 8:3—bed, not beds; 1:16b; Rom 16:16).
8. We decide to CONVERSE with each other.
We shall make time daily to have unhurried conversation. We will share all the day’s happenings. We will not be discouraged by heated conversations, believing that we improve every day. We will learn to avoid words and subjects that hurt the other and try our best to be a pleasant talking companion. We will never say, “I made a mistake in marrying you,” nor talk of divorce (SS 2:14; 4:11; Col 3:9).
9. We decide to LISTEN to each other.
We shall give undivided attention when one is talking. We will look into the eyes while the other is talking, unless impossible. We will respond appropriately. We will not cut or tell the other to shut up. We will not discourage the talker by yawning or changing the topic or walking away, but show interest. Silence will not be our answer (Eph 5:21; 1 Pet 5:5; Jud 13:6-8,22,23).
10. We decide to HELP each other.
We shall not let the other slog. When one is overburdened the other will give a helping hand. We will give due care and attention when one is sick. We will not show signs of irritation when the partner needs help. We will stand together when one faces a crisis. We will help each other spiritually by reading the Bible and praying together. We will share our spiritual knowledge and experiences. We will fast a meal and pray for an hour for the family atleast once a week. We will lift up the other when one falls, instead of heaping words of condemnation (Rom 14:19, 15:14; I Cor 11:33; Col 3:16).
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, 8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
Decisions of a Husband &Wife
1. We decide to LOVE each other.
We shall not allow anything or anyone to quench our love. We will revive the love when seemingly quenched. We decide to call each other by an endearing name and start it boldly without feeling shy. Every day we will do something to express our love by our words and actions. We will remember each other’s Birthdays and our Wedding Anniversary and celebrate them. We will smile a lot at each other (Rom 13:8-10; 1 Thess 3:12; 4:9; 1 Pet 1:22).
2. We decide to APPRECIATE each other.
We shall not focus on the negative but rather appreciate the positive aspects of the mate. We will not for ego sake hold in a word of congratulation. We will cooperate in developing a gift or talent manifested by the other, though seemingly insignificant. We will not be jealous when one is praised by others, rather rejoice (Gal 5:26; Phil 2:3,4).
3. We decide to FORGIVE each other.
We shall bury the past. We will not make reference to past sins, mistakes or humiliating incidents, no not even a hint. We will not allow the devil to fill us with an inferiority complex because of the past but help one another to come out of it. Everyday before bedtime we will settle any misunderstandings and then pray together (Eph 4:2,32; Col 3:13; Js 5:16).
4. We decide to RESPECT each other.
We shall not snub one another or joke at the cost of the other. We will not throw off the other’s suggestions without pondering over it. We will not make rude comments and criticisms on the other’s figure, dress, manners, habits, family, etc. But any correction will be made gently with love in private. We will not beat, raise our hands or voice, or throw things during arguments. We will discuss, not fight over disputes. We will not talk ill of the other to the children (Eph 5:33; 1 Pet 3:7,8; Rom 12:10).
5. We decide to SATISFY each other.
We shall keep the other as the centre of our attention. “I” will not be the focus. In matters pertaining to food, outing, clothes, friends, children, hobby, sex, etc., we will see that the other is satisfied. We will often ask, “What do you want?” or “What do you like?” or “Which one do you prefer?” or “What is your opinion?” before taking decisions. We decide not to cross the Scriptural boundary in satisfying the other. We will not drive the other crazy by over-expectation for satisfaction (1 Cor 10:24; 1 Cor 7:3- 5,33,34b).
6. We decide to UNDERSTAND each other.
We shall try our best to know and understand each other’s longings, feelings, hurts, dreams, sorrows and joys. We will try to understand each other’s physical, social, spiritual and emotional needs. We will not pry into the other’s thought life, nor blame one’s thoughts, knowing we are not mind-readers. We will not swallow our hurts, making it difficult for the other to understand us but learn to express it without anger (1 Sam 1:8; Rom 14:2,3; Gal 6:2; 1 Thess 4:18).
7. We decide to TOUCH each other.
We shall not be embarassed to touch one another. We shall put out the idea that to touch is only for sex. We will touch while talking, laughing and enjoying some fun together. We will be together in social functions. We will hold hands and pray before retiring to bed. We will hold hands before we fall asleep. We will not sleep separately (SS 8:3—bed, not beds; 1:16b; Rom 16:16).
8. We decide to CONVERSE with each other.
We shall make time daily to have unhurried conversation. We will share all the day’s happenings. We will not be discouraged by heated conversations, believing that we improve every day. We will learn to avoid words and subjects that hurt the other and try our best to be a pleasant talking companion. We will never say, “I made a mistake in marrying you,” nor talk of divorce (SS 2:14; 4:11; Col 3:9).
9. We decide to LISTEN to each other.
We shall give undivided attention when one is talking. We will look into the eyes while the other is talking, unless impossible. We will respond appropriately. We will not cut or tell the other to shut up. We will not discourage the talker by yawning or changing the topic or walking away, but show interest. Silence will not be our answer (Eph 5:21; 1 Pet 5:5; Jud 13:6-8,22,23).
10. We decide to HELP each other.
We shall not let the other slog. When one is overburdened the other will give a helping hand. We will give due care and attention when one is sick. We will not show signs of irritation when the partner needs help. We will stand together when one faces a crisis. We will help each other spiritually by reading the Bible and praying together. We will share our spiritual knowledge and experiences. We will fast a meal and pray for an hour for the family atleast once a week. We will lift up the other when one falls, instead of heaping words of condemnation (Rom 14:19, 15:14; I Cor 11:33; Col 3:16).
Dr. Lilian Stanley
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91 9843511943
lilianstanley@gmail.com
Blessing Youth Mission
13 Church Colony
Vellore 632006, India
+91-416-2242943, +91-416-2248943
hq@bymonline.org
www.bymonline.org
Click here for more options
To buy books written by Dr. Lilian Stanley, kindly reach to us in the follwing address
Blessing Literature Centre
21/11 West Coovam River Road,
Chintadripet,
Chennai 600 002, India.
+91-44-28450411, Mob:8806270699
blc@bymonline.org
